Back Home and New Years

Grammy picked us up that evening and we stayed with her that night. The next day we relaxed at her house while we tried to adjust to Eastern time.

Eventually we got in the car and made the final trek back home. Once home, Don went to the store to get us enough food to last the next few days while I stayed home with Rebekah and took inventory of the mess. Or maybe I just made a mess... Love to travel and see family, not sure I love the clean up.

I decided while we were in Utah that Don and I needed to go to Deseret Books to get me a new scripture case. My old was pretty thrashed. From all the miles of my mission to getting to close to my bedside lamp... I had it since I was 8 so it's 36 years old. Guess it was time for the new. But still so many memories.

So, while there we went with my mom and she bought me this. Very nice.

While I was unpacking Rebekah painted a picture for the neighbor lady who watched our house while we were gone.

New Years Eve was full of fun stuff. One of the things we did was create a goal sheet - basically the one the church has put out for the youth but we made it big so we could all make new year goals. Each person has a color and the family goal has a color too.

Love these two snuggling - although I think Rebekah was getting smushed...

Then we built Rebekah's 3D puzzle.

It even glows in the dark:

And by then we were all pretty tired so we watched a show and went to bed. My kind of party.

Happy New Years! On to 2020!

Hard to Say Goodbye

The next morning we all went to my mother's ward and sang a musical number she wrote. It's a song she wrote some time ago but the words are timeless.

Families are forever, through all eternity

Families are forever, it is our destiny

But while you try to be worthy in all your work and play

Also try to remember that families are for today.

Families are forever, a very long time away

But it makes it seem much closer when we share love today

So make some time together, and try not to delay

'Cause families are forever but especially for today.

Needless to say, I cried through the whole thing: seeing all my brother's and their families together at church singing about families taking time together, yeah I was a mess.

Right after we sang, Don left to see Kayla speak in her ward, leaving Rebekah and me behind to finish out the church meeting. After the meeting was over a kind lady came to talk to me and say how wonderful the musical number was. She then asked if we all came together for Christmas. I tried to answer about Rebekah's baptism but it was pointless with all the tears. Joseph stepped in and finished the conversation.

Afterwards, we got one more picture. You can see the effect of two days of tears in my face.

So love these two.

Then Rebekah and I headed back to Daniel's. Rebekah played with Sam while I packed.

I was so concerned about going over weight limits on our trip back to Indy. We borrowed a carryon from my mom and I put all the heavy stuff and the expensive Christmas gifts in that bag. Then Michael helped me weigh the checked bag. It was exactly where it needed to be.

Then we got one more picture. Rebekah was less than enthusiastic because she didn't want to leave either.

Another one last picture:

One more one last....

And wow. It's so hard to leave!

We get to the airport and to the car rental return. It's dark, covered parking, loud car horns, and cars moving every which way. Rebekah lost her mind. I tired to keep her calm while the rental assistant checked in our car. Turns out we should have paid more attention.

*A few weeks later I see another charge from Avis. Long story short they have us returning the car on January 6th. However, I kept the receipt! But the receipt I had didn't have Don's name on it, but rather someone else. The rental assistant must have switched receipts or checked the car incorrectly. At this point we have argued back and forth with Avis and most recently have sent them our flight receipts, our baggage receipt, our credit card statement showing our baggage receipt, our credit card statement showing other purchases in Indy after that date. Here's hoping that, and our prayers, will triumph other wise it's another $500 charge. Check your receipts people!
**As typing this Don called, said our Avis case has been resolved. They believed us and credited our credit card. YAY!

In the airport, it was way less crowded than we imagined.

Rebekah was a trouper and carried the extra carryon.

Once in the plane Rebekah peeked in on the pilots and the flight attendant saw her and told her to go all in. The following ensued:

The look on her face:

As my sister in law said, "SLC Airport: How do you like me know?"

The flight was full of anxiety for me. Right after take off there was this weird sound followed by the pilot announcement to the plane that they had to cool the landing gear off and the sound we heard was the vents opening. But at that point every bump was terrifying not to mention I was overly concerned about the plane landing. However, all my anxiety was in vain for we landed and all was well.

Rebekah even got to bond with the pilot on the way out.

Baptism Day

Over a year ago I was pondering Rebekah's baptism and where we would do it at our ward primary meeting for all those who would get baptized during 2019. Although I had nothing to do with said meeting I cried watching Rebekah and taking it all in: I couldn't get over the fact that she would be turning 8!

Soon after Don and I talked about where to have the baptism. I wanted her to feel the family support as she was surrounded by the confirmation circle, partly because of her great level of anxiety but mostly because family is eternal and I wanted her to have that bond. So it was decided: we would do the baptism in Utah.

We made it around Christmas on account of Don's business giving everyone a week off for Christmas. All my brothers and their family came in to town but I had to go one step further. I spoke to my aunt Diane, my daddy's sister, and mention we would love have her present. She in turn suggested I email all my daddy's siblings which I did. I then spoke to my daddy's good friends (who have remained my good friends) the Mullins'. I texted with missionary companions, old roommates, and all good friends who live in Utah. After that I kept thinking about a good friend that lives in Indy so I texted with her too and yes, it turned out that they would be in Utah over the holidays so I asked them to come too.

Then I worked on the program and made sure all of the immediate family (except me of course - I would be the official crying person) participated in some manner - from prayers to designing the program.

Then there was the dress... which was insanely difficult and I think I only got the okay for the dress because Rebekah and Don were both extremely tired of looking at dresses (I thought I was picky) - and then the shoes (I learned my lesson and picked two shoes and had Rebekah choose between).

Then there was getting info from our bishop and emailing Kayla's bishop and conversing via email about reserving the building, clothes, etc and so on, which was not an easy process.

Finally it was the day.

It started out rough.

The first thing that happened was my mom and brother showed up way before we did and since it was not a familiar ward building or even a city they were familiar with they wanted us there and were wondering where we were.

When we finally got there, my 89 year old uncle and his 85 year old ailing wife chose to take me up on the invitation and drove down from Bountiful, but were currently lost and needed directions. I'm not familiar with the area and they don't know Don's family whose area it is, so I jumped out of the car to find my brother who was better with directions. At the same time Rebekah was trying to get out of the car, somehow the programs were spilt out of the folder and flying in the wind, the rental car horn started honking profusely making it made it hard for my aunt to hear me and she starting trying to get my attention at the same time Don was hollering for me to help. Politely as I could I hung up on my aunt with the promise that I would have my brother call her back as soon as I could. I then called Jo who came running to my aid, continually saying he wasn't familiar with the area - to which I replied by pulling up my map app, pushed the phone into his hand and said, "do your best," then I ran back to help Don.

We were able to save most of the programs, but a few were decorated with footprints.

At that point we learned that the clothes were forgotten until last minute and haven't arrived yet. But the people were. We ran through the musical number Rebekah requested but my mom was having trouble adapting to the new song. At that point I suggested I could play it to which she agreed and I prayed that I would not cry through the whole song during the performance. Yes, I cry a lot these days.

Finally the clothes arrived and I started the getting dressed process. I thought we were pretty far behind but the brother presiding said we still had time for some pictures. I had a plan of how to stand and such but was so anxious about timing (not my home base - didn't know how patient this guy was) that I didn't think I could change from what he wanted. To that end, Don is not happy with the photo, and while it's an honor that we have the picture of the Savior in the background, I wish I could have arranged it somewhat differently.

The program was beautiful from the prayers to the talks. Each one that participated made it so personal to Rebekah: it was exactly what I had hoped it would be. It was a once in a life time thing walking back to the font with Rebekah and I cried copious tears; not only because she's my little girl, but I was so proud of her choice to continue on the path towards becoming like Jesus. She is such a precious little girl and I am so honored to be her mama.

Then we did the musical number, which I made through without tears. After my big brother Daniel gave his talk. Watching him I felt such an increase of love for him. He stepped into the several rolls my daddy would have filled from helping me with advice on education, to buying my first condo, to marriage, to this talk for my little girl. Words cannot express.

After his talk it was time for the confirmation and the gift of the Holy Ghost. Don, his son in law Josh, and my 3 brothers were ready to go but we had a few last minute additions: my uncle Barrie, uncle Darwin, and brother Cruickshank were added into the circle. It was a big circle. At that moment  it felt unfair to me that my daddy wasn't there. I admit I was selfish and tears of loss and sadness flowed as freely as spiritual and happy tears.

It was only after the moment - after everyone had said, "your father was here..." that I realized in a very special way he was. I wrote the following to my daddy's siblings, and instead of re-inventing the wheel as it were, I'll copy and paste in the hopes that I will cry less now:

I had some strong feelings come over me when my brother Daniel gave his talk about the Holy Ghost; I have been grateful that he has stepped up to fill in for daddy in so many ways and this was just one more of those moments for me. When my husband got up for the confirmation my soul cried out. I usually hold it together relatively well but at this moment it felt so poignant that my daddy wasn’t in the circle. 

After I arrived home Aunt Diane sent a beautiful email with a dream she had where my daddy said the words, “I am here.” I pondered on her words some time, and pondered on how many people were physically there which lead me to the epiphany that he was there:

In the love my brother’s showed for me and their niece, a love they’ve learned from their father’s example; 

In the love that my uncle Barrie (of whom I know my father thought extremely high) and my dear aunt Elaine showed me when they traveled into unknown lands to participate; 

In the love of my aunt Diane who wrote several beautiful words to me and to my little girl; 

In the love of a friend of my daddy's, one that he - with the power of the Lord - helped to return to full activity in the church; 

To the love of all the friends who came to support me, for my daddy made me who I am today. 

All were there in Rebekah’s confirmation circle. My daddy's spirit was definitely there and his influence continues to linger on in my life and therefore my daughter’s life. I am so grateful for that legacy.

After the service was over I pleaded a mother's prerogative and asked for a picture of everyone present. I am honored that so many people came to show their support for me, Don and my little girl.

Everything after that was a blur. So many pictures:

College roomie

My good friend Pamela

Rebekah with her nieces and nephew

My mother made a plethora of cookies, all so deliciously wonderful

My aunts wanted to make sure we capture the original William Rulon Stirland family for posterity. (Notice my face is extremely puffy with all the crying.)

Then we got my aunts and uncle in the picture

Then all the little Stirlands got to join us

Adding a few of my cousins

Adding my daddy's friends uncle Darwin and aunt Kim (not blood related, but close enough).

My cousin and Rebekah (and Sam looking dapper in the background).

Don's side of things: the Walkers and the Youngs.

Rebekah and Paige

And one my friend Pamela took of us. So grateful she did because I totally forgot!

My sister in law made this for people to sign so Rebekah could remember everyone who was there.

She also drew the artwork on the program.

Figured I'd put the songs Rebekah requested for her baptism in here too.

And of course there was the rejoiceful spinning:

After the baptism was over we went to Kayla's for one more time. Henry wanted to play one last game with grandpa. 

Saying goodbye to Cole

Big sister and big brother-in-law

Then we headed back to Daniel's for one more dinner with the Stirlands. Oh, and I forced two more pictures. One of me and my four brothers.

And one of the next generation. 

Oh, and I got this awesome picture of my little brother and his girl Lily. Love this! 

Then we all scattered throughout Daniel's house. Some of us played Carcassonne - a game Michael has been itching to play since he got into town. 

Then Joseph decided to juggle Shelly's oranges. Rebekah loves to watch but I couldn't find her so I forced him to do it again so I could record the moment. 

Eventually everyone went home and the realization of the end of our trip was almost too much for me to handle. But more on that in the next post. 

Thursday & Friday

Thursday morning the Stirland family met at IHOP for breakfast.

Rebekah wanted a little independence and chose to sit at the other end of the table close to her cousins, far out of mama's reach. At one point I looked down and saw this:

That's my little brother poring syrup onto a spoon for Rebekah to taste. They were taste testing all the types of syrup. And Rebekah loved every minute of it.

After breakfast we sent Rebekah back with the cousins and Don, mom, and I went to Deseret Book to  do a little shopping. Afterwards we went back to mom's and worked on the program for the baptism. I had asked AmySue to design a program and a page that those that came to the baptism could sign. It was quite a process putting everything together but it turned out great. I will post a picture on the baptism post to come.

We printed, bought napkins, and then Don dropped me off and went to develop a picture to display at the baptism.

I'm so glad Don dropped me off because the family was about ready to head out for a walk. Toby loved soaking up all the attention.

Rebekah was somewhat disappointed that mama was coming, but I promised her I would walk far behind and not get in the way of cousin fun. Yes, we are in that stage of life.

Have I mentioned I love Utah?

And my family...?

Once we got back to Daniel's it was time for the cousins to leave. Rebekah was quite sad so Spencer made a bunny out of my gloves.

Spencer is my hero.

The next morning we left daddy sleeping and had an early morning cooking session with Michael. He brought home grown pecans all the way from Texas so we could make yummy pecan bars.

I loved watching these two together.

At some point Chester, who was missing my mom - she had run to the store - ran into the music room and jumped on the piano bench. I followed about a minute later and talked lovingly to the dog saying,  "Are you waiting for mom? She's not home yet..." and started petting his head. No sooner had I done this then mom's car drove into the parking spot. Seriously. That dog must have ESP or something.

While the pecan bars cooked, Michael introduced us to a game called Carcassonne.

Soon it was time to head back to Daniel's, pick up Don, and head out to Kayla's. Once there Rebekah played with her nieces and nephews, only stopping to have a mini snow cone from their Christmas snow cone machine.

We stayed until Josh got home. Love watching the kids interact with their dad. Such love!

Then we headed back home for a good night's sleep. Next up: baptism!